my baby went thru the previous post line by line.. n he said only God can achieve all of the above... there's no match made in heaven, but i believe there is that one guy that possesses most of the above, and i'll love him for even his imperfections. i'll confess, zk's the only one that got that close so far. credentials wise, character wise, there might have been better. but chemistry wise, i think not many ppl can click w me. well, i havent had many candidates anw.

kyan's doing well w his gf of a yr, n he told her bout us, our short but memorable past. she was quite amazed, just like how my frens are amazed. it wasnt that long a period of time, but i must say that those were the happiest times of my life. short beautiful memories. he was the perfect company for one seeking some fun, seeking some solace. for him, it was more than a fling. but we parted well, n here we are, telling our bf/gf bout our happy moments once. he still keeps his option for me open. haha!

2004. xmas wasnt spent w sy. we quarrelled. i cant even rmr what we quarrelled about, cos we always quarrelled. spent it out w frens, then drank w some guys n got wasted.
2005. xmas was spent working, still without sy. cos this time round, we've broken up. but that didnt take him out of my life, cos i got drunk again, n the reason was him. fireworks were pretty, they were such a sight, but i rmr that lonely feeling within when i was watching the fireworks w chris while working in AD. brianna n i teared, n we knew what each other were tearing for. i love my colleagues, really. roy, eric, brianna, john, viki, hua, chris, johnny, herbert, roza, ashid.. all of them made my xmas so much easier to bear.
2006. xmas will be spent w darlings cos zk's gonna be working. maybe i can spend the night w him? hope so. no more tears, no more fireworks, no more customers to chat with on a lonely xmas night. but definitely a much happier mad spending precious time with her long-neglected darlings, her sweeties that have supported her thru.

brianna.. i wonder how's everything w her job n all now. hope things are fine between her n nic too. suddenly recalled how we cried hugging each other, in the middle of AD, and then in a mth, both of us got attached. she was one huge pillar of support, at work, with matters of the heart.. she was always there. of cos there were the rest. john, a guy i probably took for granted and unknowingly took advantage of. roy, always showering sweet nothings (to everyone) n giving me hugs to make me feel loved. eric liew, viki n some others (i actually forgot their names.. gosh...) made working so fun i didnt mind working from afternoon to night everyday. it was my destress outlet since i got officially dumped. haha. then aria family, the whole aria family. got to know a chris small boy after 2 mths. a detested member of the aria family, the churchboy, whatever u call him. i knew i was seeking fun when i agreed to go out w him. nv did i expect it to go so far. okay 8 mths isnt that 'far', but if u consider a one week fling turning into this... i guess its unexpected. pretty uncalled for. i wasnt ready for another r/s at all, n i've no idea what made me take the plunge. i wont hope for much, i only hope for both of us to be happy in this r/s, for as long as it may last.. even if we were to part one day, i'd hope it'd be a better break up than the previous. at least i know im a stronger girl than before.

took some stupid online quizzes. from "an independent girlfriend" in dec 2004, i've upgraded to a "perfect girlfriend" in dec 2006. that's for a quiz that says "what girlfriend are you?". not bad.. i consider that an improvement. insomnia. i need rest.